Howdy. Nice to meet you, buddy. I think a virtual handshake is in order. Excuse the sweaty hands. Just to put this to rest before it becomes a thing, I can spell sarcasm. I’ll challenge you to use your brain and look at my name again. Well, it’s a little early to be getting passive aggressive but that’s just me, I guess. I am in a slightly bad mood as Spotify recommends either the He-Man song or dubstep. I just pray that I’ll never have to see a combination of the two as it could either be glorious or disastrous.

I’ve given up trying to become famous through blogging, twitter, streaming e.t.c. So I’ll just count this as a retirement project. I have had a very successful failure career to date so I wouldn’t want to tarnish that prestige. Anyway, I’m a young Irish lad who shouldn’t be blogging but is … Hmm, blogging doesn’t sit well with me. How about…? An internet diary? That could just be worse. Let’s say this is a digital memoir. Nobody in their right mind would want to read that. This is a covert operation to disguise my cringe, unfortunately. Or you could call it humour. I guess it resembles marmite. Of course, because it’s yellow and Australians can’t get enough of it … [The ‘either love it or you hate it’ was a bit cliche].

So, I simply intend to write and ramble. Tangents are inevitable. I won’t try and avoid them because if I think too hard it’s guaranteed that I won’t say anything. Maybe if I just talk myself up enough, somebody out there might believe it. I’m possibly the most TALENTED human being on the planet. Wow, I can feel my internet ego growing. Let’s try again. I is kind, I is smart, I is important. This is HELPing drastically. It’s sad how I’m proud of that pun! I’d say this already needs the blog equivalent of a Grammy. Ok, I see how this Introduction barely taught you anything about me so I’ll see myself out.

~Matt [p.s. there’ll be a lot of elipses]


13 thoughts on “Introduction

  1. I in awe of you because you are amazing and hilarious and I actually can’t. I give you a BLOODY WARM WELCOME to the Blogosphere, oh GOD I sound like a TV presenter or weather forecast person. Ignore me. WHATEVER. Anyway, your blog is amazing. Just from that first post. How the hell do you even… Alright, alright, you’re gonna get famous through this. Screw the arseholes that say you weren’t. Or don’t. CRAP, I’m rambling.
    Err, anywayyy… Always keep writing and filling out your online diary. It’s entertaining as hell and I love your blog. I said that already.


    1. Jesus! I wasn’t expecting support already. I thought this was going to be a little sad thing that I wrote into but uh … thanks! It seems like people are very friendly here already and I’m seriously enjoying it. And I have always loved a bit of rambling 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  2. In my mind, I thought of your username “That’s spelled wrong…” And then you mentioned it. And I’m already laughing.
    I now officially give you full responsibility to my daily dose of ellipses.


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